Forgive me, sister
by b92morgan
Summary: After receiving shocking revelations, Morgause will have to choose between her faith and magic, and her love for her sister Morgana. What will she choose?


**I got the idea of this FF after watching this scene between Morgause and Morgana in 3x13. **

** . **

**. Morgause's sad face when Morgana explains she wants to kill everyone made me think that maybe Morgause was not as evil as Morgana. I think Morgause trully wanted magic to be free, while Morgana only wanted power.**

**\- English is nor my first language**

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The doors of the Great Hall opened, and the once Right hand of Prince Arthur, Sir Leon, was dragged inside by two immortal soldiers and forced to kneel in front of the throne where the false Queen sat.

"Tell me, Sir Leon, how have you enjoyed the first week of my reign? Speak up. Are you and your fellow knights ready to honour and serve me?"

"I would rather die"

"That can be arranged" Smirked Morgause from her sister's right side. She looked like a cat playing with its little prey.

"My loyalty is to the King and Prince Arthur. There is nothing you can do to change that"

"We shall see" Hissed Morgana, before nodding to the soldiers to take the prisoner away.

000

Later, every Camelot citizen was in the courtyard, for something they never thought would happen: the execution of the Knights of Camelot.

Morgause smiled at the thought, enjoying the fact these useless subjects were forced to witness helplessly to the end of their heroes, unable to do anything…exactly as when they did nothing to stop the executions of her kind!

From the main balcony, she stood by her sister's side, as always, as the Queen spoke to the men in red, "I will give you one more chance to pledge your allegiance to me"

She watched amused as their beloved Sir Leon lifted his head fearlessly and smirked, before shouting, "Long live the King!"

"Long live the King!" Echoed the rest of the brave knights. _Stupid men_, thought the blond witch.

She shared a knowing smile with her sister, before Morgana said, "Perhaps this will help you change your mind." She raised her hand, the soldiers turned their crossbows to the people instead of the knights.

Leon saw that and, panicked, yelled a desperate _No!_... but it was too late. The soldiers started to shoot the innocence people, killing many of them.

It was then that Morgause felt a pang in her chest that made her gasp and lean her hands against the balcony edge.

"Sister?" She could hear Morgana asking with a worried voice, but she had to ignore her, too focused on what was happening to her.

All of sudden, when the arrows were released, her magic had felt unrest, as if something big was bothering and saddening it. Being one of the most powerful High Priestess of the Old Religion of all times, she found no issues in looking inside her own soul, where her magic lived, and connecting her mind to it. This way she could see what no human could, only magic. It changed the way she could see the world around her. Now she was able to see the energy of living beings.

And then was when she understood. Down there in the courtyard, among the dead, there were some magic users. And they had just killed them.

Shocked, Morgause looked around hastily with her magic. She saw a woman lying on the ground, an arrow in her heart. She had magic, powerful one. And Morgause watched in horror as all that magic exited the woman and returned to the earth where it belonged, while the body died. Then she heard sobbing and noticed as a child, probably the daughter of the unknown witch, tried to wake up her dead mother. After a while, the child looked up toward Morgana, looking at her with pure hate. Morgause could see her soul. It was turning darker and darker, swearing revenge on the monster that had killed her mother, despite both of them having magic. Morgause understood the feeling far too well. Then she saw similar scenarios all around. Women, men and children with magic, either dormant or active, killed, despite having coming to Camelot with hope of freedom in their hearts after sensing that a magic monarch was now seating on the throne.

And that made her magic very sad.

Her trance was interrupted by her sister calling her and shaking her by the shoulders. She must have ignored her for a while now.

"Sister?"

"I am sorry, Morgana. I got distracted."

Morgana kept looking at her in worry but accepted her explanation. Her dear Morgana, always so trusting of her older sister's words. "Our men have returned the prisoners to the dungeons. Let's go back inside. People must see us strong"

Morgause followed Morgana inside and with an excuse made her way to her new rooms. Her heart still heavy from what she witnessed earlier.

000

Life in the recent conquered castle went on. And Morgause put what happened in the courtyard behind her, too busy dealing with the new found traitor.

Morgana's maid, Guinevere, revealed herself loyal to her beloved Prince, and her sister and she found a way for the little traitor to unknowingly lead them to Arthur's hidden place.

Morgause was leading her men through the forest, following the magic trace that the potion she gave Gwen before she escaped with Sir Leon had created.

When she lost the trace, she murmured the revealing spell once again. However, this time, instead of the expected bright golden path, only an intermittently faint light appeared, barely visible. She contemplated that probably the potion was losing effect, but deep inside she knew it was not the case. That potion was very potent and lost effect after about a week after taking it.

No, it was her magic that was weakening, and the witch began to suspect that what she saw in the courtyard was just the beginning.

000

Morgause returned to the castle after failing her attempted to capture or kill Arthur Pendragon.

"He was lucky to escape. I'm sorry, Sister."

Morgana scoffed, "What can he do? Arthur has but a handful of men. We have an immortal army at our disposal."

"Yes, but whist Arthur lives, the people will not yield."

"Then we will make them. Tonight we will have a gallows built, and tomorrow, one by one, we will put an end to the knights of Camelot and to everyone loyal to them"

Morgause's face suddenly became sad at the prospect, remembering the massacre of the courtyard, "But sister, among these citizens there could be magic users. We must ensure that we do not kill our own. We must not act without thinking."

Morgana did not seem happy with this idea, but she smiled at her sister, even though her eyes stayed cold, "The more we wait, the more people's hope for Arthur's return increases - we have to use an iron fist, _now_. They need to learn that things will not come back to how they used to be"

"But the magic users..."

Morgana interrupted her, taking her by the shoulders, "Morgause, sister, this is what we have been working toward for so long. A kingdom where magic is free and dominates, through me..." Morgause gave her a look, "..._us_, I mean. We have to clean this kingdom from the traitors, from those scums that do not have the Gift. Only then we can rebuild our kingdom." Morgana looked down, feigning sadness, "And if, unfortunately, on the way the lives of some innocent must perish, I am sure that they will be honored to know that their sacrifice will not be in vain, that thanks to them a better world will begin."

That said, the fake queen left, leaving a torn sister behind. Morgause's mind and heart told her to listen to her sister, her only family…but her magic was screaming that it was wrong.

000

Still feeling unrest, Morgause needed to find answers, so she decided to go to the Isle of the Blessed, where magic and the presence of the Goddess were still strong.

She arrived at the shores of the Great Seas of Meredor at dawn; the Isle was as usual half-hidden by the mists.

Like every time she saw the Isle, she smiled, remembering all the years she spent there with other Priestesses nursing her magic, still when those hallways were more beautiful than any palace, and they were teaming with women... when that whole island was pulsing with possibility and life. How she wished for it to be so once again.

She wait and wait for the ferryman to take her by boat to the Isle to arrive, but he never came.

Morgause frowned in confusion. The man should feel her magic and therefore knowing there was a Priestess eager to reach the Isle.

"He won't come" A deep voice said from behind her.

Startled that someone managed to sneak on her without her noticing it, she turned around, a spell ready to be cast, but what she saw stopped her.

A huge golden dragon stood in front of her!

The dragon – Morgause swore to the Goddess – chuckled while looking down at her, "Hello, Witch!"

That awakened her from his stupor. She lifted her head and looked at the magical creature before her straight in the eyes, "Dragon... I am not a witch. I am a High Priestess of the Old Religion"

Kilgharrah laughed, "Then, I suggest you start acting like one ..."

Morgause frowned and then snapped, "What are you talking about, creature? Speak, or I will not hesitate to destroy you!"

"You shouldn't threat a dragon, witch. We are ancient, wise and powerful beings that have been roaming the Earth since magic was born, long before mankind appeared. We used to be worshiped by your kind…but what should I expect? Standards have lowered themselves recently after all" Said Kilgharrah as he continued to stare at the blonde, clearly emphasizing that he was not impressed with the still alive Priestesses' abilities, and Morgause did not miss it, and got mad.

"How dare you?! I…"

"…have forgotten your way!"

That stopped Morgause on the spot, "Again, dragon, what do you mean?"

Kilgharrah sighed and replied with more patience, "Morgause, daughter of Vivienne and Gorlois of Cornwall, last witch trained by the _real_ High Priestesses, I am afraid that you have lost your path and forgotten what the Gifts the Goddess has given you are for"

"What are you saying? I have dedicated my whole life serving the Goddess and even now everything I do is her will! "

"Her will or yours?"

Morgause said nothing, so Kilgharrah pressed further. "When was the last time that, through the prayers and rituals you were taught, you asked her what she wanted?"

"It is obvious that my Goddess desires the return of magic!"

"It is true ... but if you had tried to listen to her, you would know that the problem is what you are doing to save magic ... and since you don't want to listen to her, the Goddess had to find another way to inform you of her disapproval. Try to guess which one "

It didn't take long for Morgause to understand, "My magic is weakening." She exclaimed in horror. "Why would the Goddess want to deny me the gift she gave me at birth and that I have cultivated for years?!"

"Because you are ABUSING that gift! You're abusing that sacred power, you're manipulating it, poisoning it. You're destroying it. Through those like you and your sister that gift is no longer pure, sacred, natural. It is evil, corrupt, enslaved. Therefore the Goddess is taking it away from you, before you finish what even Uther failed to do: destroying magic"

Morgause lifted her head indignantly, even though inside she was beginning to believe, "You're wrong, dragon ... my sister and I are the saviors of magic. With Morgana on the throne of Camelot, magic will bloom once again, and peace will reign over our people ... they will be free and safe"

"Then why are you killing them?"

Hit in the heart. Morgause stopped breathing for a moment, remembering that terrible day. "That was an accident ..." She tried to defend herself unnecessarily.

"If repeating this lie is what makes you sleep at night, go ahead ... but we both know that that day was another tragedy for the magic community. Tell me, _savior of the magic people_, what does it feel like to stand on Camelot's balcony and watch the massacre of magic? Exactly as Uther Pendragon used to do!"

That irritated her, "There was nothing I could do! I didn't know there were magic users in the crowd, only the silly, magic-less, cowardly citizens of Camelot!"

Kilgharrah shook his head in disapproval, "And then you ask me why I'm sure you're not a High Priestess? If you were one for real, you would know that there is magic in everything and everyone. We call our goddess Mother for a reason. She has given all her children life. Magic is life. It's the life of our souls. The only difference is that some of us are able to manifest magic, while in others it remains dormant. The High Priestesses, like dragons and other creatures more tied to the earth, were able to perceive the magic in everyone and help them manage this extraordinary gift in respect with the Earth and life." Kilgharrah scoffed. "But why am I wasting my time explaining what you should already know but have decided to ignore?"

Morgause shook her head, "That's what I'm doing!"

"NO" Kilgharrah roared, "You are teaching people that magic is something to fear, something that kills. You are teaching other magic users that the only way to achieve freedom is revenge, murder, desecrating nature and life ... In this way you are poisoning their magic ... exactly as you did with your sister's"

Morgause was incredulous, "What are you saying? I saved Morgana. In Camelot she was suffocating, repressing her magic. She was in danger there. Thanks to me, Morgana is finally using her potential. She will be the greatest sorceress who ever existed, and now also the greatest queen, who will lead the magic people to safety" She said with immense confidence, raising her head proudly.

The dragon chuckled in derision, "On the contrary, witch. You completely ruined her life. From now on, with or without you, your sister's life will be full of pain, hatred, loneliness, darkness...and her magic completely corrupt and dirty."

Kilgharrah pushed the images of Morgana's future into Morgause's mind. She saw and felt what will happen to her beloved sister. She saw her pain. She saw her despair during the years in Sarrum's hands. She saw how she would only become a body without a soul, guided only by revenge, since she had nothing left to live for. Nothing else, not even her desire to protect magic, only pure revenge.

"NOOO!" Morgause screamed, interrupting the visions. She started pacing, agitated.

It was not possible. Morgana was destined for greatness. She had known it from the beginning. She was destined for the greatness of the High Priestesses of the past, like herself and their mother, if not more. A High Priestess Queen. What a vision!

But the woman she had seen in the visions did not even remotely resemble the High Priestess Queen whom her beloved sister was destined to be. That was just a broken and bitter woman, so blinded by revenge that she didn't care to kill magic users in order to achieve her goals.

She looked at Kilgharrah, lost, her eyes slightly wet, "That's not possible"

Kilgharrah nodded, "Unfortunately, yes. Morgana's destiny has always been unclear, constantly changing, but always inclined to darkness. Her only chance of salvation laid in Camelot as a defender of the weakest and by dedicating her magic to the protection of those who could not protect themselves. And for some years she did. But thanks to you, she lost herself."

At that point, Morgause opened her arms almost in exasperation. "Then tell me what should I have done?! Should I have hidden like a coward and watched while Uther Pendragon slaughtered my people and terrorized my sister?! No! Someone had to do something. You might not like my methods, dragon, but at least I did something. It is not a crime to fight for your freedom and the right to be yourself"

Something like sadness shone in Kilgharrah's eyes. "Do you really believe that I don't understand what you are feeling, Morgause? For twenty years the same man who had slaughtered my breed, my brothers, my sisters, my children, imprisoned me in a cave! And for all that time I wanted only two things: freedom, but above all, revenge"

"Then why did you stop when you freed yourself two years ago and finally get your revenge? If you know what I feel, why are you asking me to do the same thing, to stop?"

"Because someone very wise made me realize that what I was doing was wrong. I was pouring my anger towards the innocent, when the person I hated most, Uther, was safe in the castle. I was showing those innocents that Uther was right. That magic is evil, kills, hurts. This person reminded me of the power of mercy and forgiveness. And one day the Goddess will reward my patience and redemption by giving me what I crave more than anything else in the world"

"And what would that be?"

Kilgharrah smiled, "Not to be the last of my kind. One day dragons will return to fly in the skies of Albion"

Morgause scoffed even though she was very curious. "And who would this very wise person be, who even managed to make himself be listened by a dragon?"

"The Last Dragonlord and King of Magic. Emrys is among us"

Morgause's eyes widened to an unbelievable extent. "Emrys... It's impossible. Emrys is just a legend, a fairy tale for children"

The dragon laughed openly at those words. "For being the daughter and sister of powerful Seers, you are very blind. Emrys is not a fairy tale. He is real. The prophecy that surrounds him is coming true. He is the Goddess's response to the Great Purge. At a time when magic was at the weakest, the Goddess created a human being to be magic itself, in its purest state. A light to eradicate the darkness."

Morgause remained silent for a few minutes, while a light breeze ruffled her golden hair. Even though she believed in the dragon, there was still something that didn't convince her.

"And where has this _savior_ been all these years? Was he hiding? From what I remember of the fairy t - I mean prophecy - Emrys is the most powerful sorcerer of all, not only because of his magic, but because of his wisdom"

"Oh, he is. But unlike the popular image, he is not an old wizard, no, he is young. He was born during the Great Purge. He experienced pain and fear on his own skin. He grew up hiding his magic, believing he was a monster because of it"

The blonde felt sympathy for her kind. Legend or not, it was nice to know that the person the goddess had chosen knew all too well what it meant to have a gift that the rest of the world saw as a curse, and what it meant to hide who you really are.

"So what is he doing to help our people? Because until now, unfortunately, I have not perceived the presence of someone else who is fighting against the Pendragons"

"Here is the difference between the magic champion and you. He isn't fighting against the Pendragons. He is on their side"

"WHAT?! Is he a traitor?"

Kilgharrah shook his head, amused. "Definitely no. It is his destiny to stay in Camelot and help the royal family, especially one of them in particular"

"Who?" Morgause asked in astonishment. She couldn't find any reason that would make a legendary warlock, apparently that the goddess herself created as a vessel of magic and her will, to help that cursed family.

He chuckled, "Well, the Once and Future King, of course"

She snorted, "I will never believe that tyrant Uther is the Once and Future King. It's not possible. You're wrong"

"Of course I'm not talking about Uther. That pathetic human is not going to live for much longer and after his death his name will soon be forgotten. No. In preparation of the Great Purge, predicted by the prophets from the beginning of time, magic has chosen its champions, who would save both magic and this land. Thus, during these dark times, the King who will bring peace and prosperity with his sword, but above all with his good heart, and Emrys, the mind and the magic that will guide him towards this destiny were born. Even when we all die, Emrys will live to make sure that magic never disappears. But before all this, the once and future king must grow, learn, get rid of the fog of prejudice that his cursed father has nocked in his young mind and…"

"….Are you telling me that this legendary King is Arthur Pendragon?! Hahaha ... you are joking, right?" Morgause interrupted him, too shocked.

"The young Pendragon has a pure heart and a kind soul, like his mother, which, combined with his gift with the sword, will make him a great King. But now he is still a prince with his eyes blinded by the love for his father, and by the wrong image of the world that Uther described to him. And this is where Emrys comes into play. Emrys will show him the truth and free his mind."

"So Emrys will use his powers to manipulate the little prince into accepting magic?"

"No, Emrys will teach him that magic is not something to be scared of simply by remaining himself. He will show him that magic can be used for good, that in reality it is not just a weapon, but also life itself. And denying it means denying life. In doing so, he is making Arthur a fantastic King who will truly give us freedom. Where being different will no longer be a crime"

Morgause was speechless. Even as a child she had dreamed of freedom and knowing that her beloved Goddess was already at work at giving her that made her feel mixed emotions, especially because for the first time in her life, she no longer knew what her role was. She said the same to the dragon.

"I don't doubt your intentions, Morgause. As I have already said, I understand you too well. But trust me when I say that your actions are going against Emrys, and consequently the goddess, and you are helping to keep Arthur from his destiny, which is the key to our future. You and Morgana are confirming all that Uther has taught him, both in the heart of the prince and in that of the people. You are making the situation worse"

A lone tear slid over Morgause's face. "I always thought it was up to me to help magic survive. I have been alone for so long, just surrounded by pain and death, hopeless"

The dragon's voice became softer and more sympathetic, knowing well what the blonde was feeling. "You can still help magic. And you don't have to do it alone. It's not too late for you yet"

"What do you mean?"

"Help Emrys. Help him show the world what magic really is for. Help him advise the Once and Future King. He is destined for greatness but needs someone to teach him magic. Save magic through him. Be a High Priestess whom people admire, not fear. Be a savior, not a murderer"

Morgause started panting and turned to the Isle of the Blessed, thinking. Was it really possible? She closed her eyes and for the first time in a long time, listened to what her magic had to tell her.

After a few minutes she straightened her shoulders and turned back to Kilgharrah. "I understand. I can hear the truth in your words through the magic that binds us. There is only one problem. It won't be easy for me to convince my sister to give up the throne in favor of Arthur"

At those words the dragon's eyes became very sad, and Morgause immediately became suspicious. "What?"

"I said it wasn't too late for you. I never said it was the same for your sister. Morgana has already fully embraced her destiny and the path of darkness. Both her heart and her magic are full of it. She is completely consumed by it, so much that nothing is left of her old self, drowned in darkness, where no light can reach her"

Morgause shook her head hastily. "No, No. No way. So you're asking me to abandon my sister, my only family, in Arthur's favor? I cannot do that!"

"You are not obliged. You can choose to stay with Morgana and continue her revenge, and with it the destruction of magic, including yours. Or, you can accept the burden that the ancient Priestesses had to carry: leaving their families and renouncing being mothers and wives, in favor of the will of the Goddess and magic. The choice is yours alone, and whatever it will be, you will have to accept the consequences"

Morgause took a deep breath, unable to choose. Kilgharrah immediately understood the situation.

"I'll leave you to your thoughts. In case you honestly choose Emrys and the Once and Future King, the Goddess will reveal to you the identity of Emrys and where he is. Good luck, Morgause"

That said, he flew away, leaving a soul split in half behind.

000

Morgause spent the rest of the day and night thinking and meditating. She had always liked the night, especially with the full moon. It had always made her feel like she was in another world, where nature and magic reigned supreme, instead of men, rulers of the day. The night was woman.

After contemplating the past, the present, but above all the future for hours, she opened her eyes, stood up and looked at the moon. Slowly she undressed completely, and once naked, she entered the water of the Seas of Meredor and swam to the reflection of the moon on the dark water. A circle of light in the darkness.

She looked up at the moon and closed her eyes, "I am your servant, oh Mother, my Goddess... forgive me for ignoring you. I'm lost. Please show me the way. "

With that, she let herself be dragged underwater, where there were no sounds, besides that of her heart and her magic. And there, she found the voice of the Goddess, sweet and kind as a mother's.

When she finally emerged, her eyes were finally open.

000

Merlin was gathering wood in the woods. Well that was actually an excuse. The truth was that he needed some time away from the ruins of the castle where they had found refuge and from Arthur, who had not yet fully recovered from Morgana's betrayal, despite having just knight his friends Lancelot, Gwaine, Percival and Elyan.

So immersed in his thoughts, he did not immediately notice the presence behind him, until he heard a twig break after being trampled. He jumped from fright and surprise.

"Uhm… for being the legendary Emrys you certainly cannot keep your nerve…"

Shocked, he quickly turned to the voice, not believing his eyes, "Morgause?!"

She snorted, "What an observer"

Merlin was shocked by the presence of his enemy in front of him, but then his brain remembered how she had called him and pure terror invaded him. "How did you call me?"

She smirked and stepped forward, coming out of the shade of the trees. Merlin immediately noticed how she looked different from the woman who stood proudly next to Morgana on the day of her coronation. Her long blond hair was without accessories. The lack of makeup made her look almost innocent. She wore a long dark gray tunic, so much simpler then the provocative red dress she usually wore, which had certainly contributed to the seduction of many powerful and useful men.

She noticed his scrutiny and replied, "I am a servant of the Triple Goddess. I'm wearing the robe that represents my role. Like the Disir's"

Merlin didn't know who this Disir was, but one thing he knew. "You haven't answered my question. Why did you call me Emrys? My name is Merlin"

"That's the name your natural mother gave you. But the name of your soul, of your magic, is Emrys. The savior and king of magic. Chosen by the Goddess herself. Who would have believe"

Merlin couldn't breathe. But despite this, he pulled his shoulders up and looked Morgause in the eyes, without fear, which impressed the woman. "How do you know all this?"

"Someone very wise told me some truths"

"And what are you going to do now that you know these truths? Will you kill me for being a traitor to the magic people? Do you want to take me to Camelot so your sister can get revenge? I bet I'm already surrounded by your immortal soldiers" He said looking around.

"None of those things" She paused for a few seconds, before continuing to approach him until she was one step away from him." I want to help you realize your destiny. I... "

"Let me guess. You want me to ally myself with you to destroy the Pendragons permanently and to make sure magic dominate over every non-magic user. Well save your breath. Many have offered me the same, and I've always refused. I will never betray, Arthur"

Morgause seemed sad. "That's not what I meant. But before I explain why I'm here, tell me, why are you so loyal to Arthur?"

Merlin's eyes softened, "He is my friend."

In a second, Morgause was in his face, "Listen to me here, boy. If I'm here it's because I've decided to betray my sister, my only family ... so you better give me more than _"He's a friend"_"

Merlin had many questions, but decided to answer, "He has a good heart. I know that many see him as an arrogant, pompous and spoiled prince - and trust me, most of the time he is - but under that armor there is a kind soul, a noble warrior, a heart of gold. And this world needs a man like him, after being ruled by cruel men for so long. It is time for peace. It's time for safety. It is time for love, for forgiveness, for happiness, it is time for magic. And Arthur is the person who can give the world all this. I can see it in his eyes." Merlin shook his head slowly. "Morgana is not the person who will give us freedom. She doesn't have the heart. She is another Uther, or like any other hypocritical king of this world. A long time ago she was different, but that woman is gone. And I'm partly responsible for it"

Once this criticism of her sister would have bothered her, but now she knew it was true. She had seen it, both in the present - the image of the balcony was still painful in her mind - and in the future.

"Are you really convinced that Arthur is the King the world needs?"

The answer was immediate, "Yes, but more importantly, he is the _man_ we all need. I gave you my answer, Morgause. Now it's your turn"

She smiled slyly, "You're bossy. Well, the Great Dragon came to me and... "

"Kilgharrah?!" Merlin interrupted, screaming in surprise.

Morgause an irritated snort, "I don't know if that's his name. How do you know him? "

"I'm a Dragonlord"

"Obviously, you have to be one" She sighed, before continuing. "We'll talk about it later. Back to us. I was telling you. The Dragon - Kilgharrah - spoke to me and explained to me how Morgana and I are actually going against the salvation of magic and the will of the Goddess. At the beginning I didn't want to believe him obviously, because I can assure you that since I was a girl, my only fixed thought has always been the return of magic. Although I can't deny my strong desire for revenge against Camelot. However, Kilgharrah showed me very strong evidence of the wrong path I had taken and the negative consequences my actions will have, especially for the magical people. He gave me a choice. To continue on my path of vengeance and over time lose everything I care about, including my magic and my status as a High Priestess, or trust you Emrys, champion of the Goddess, and assist you with your destiny with Arthur. My presence here should make you understand what my choice was"

Merlin was incredulous. "Are you seriously telling me that you chose to betray Morgana for me and Arthur? I struggle to believe it "

Morgause nodded once, understanding the distrust. "It was the hardest choice I've ever made. I chose to be a High Priestess, therefore to listen to what my Mother had to say to me, not my hatred. And the Goddess spoke to me, confirming what the dragon told me. I chose to save magic. And if I have to help you and Arthur to do it, so be it"

"Yes but what about Morgana?" Merlin insisted.

Morgause took a deep breath. "I know my sister will never give up the throne and revenge. I saw it in her future and above all I saw it in the present. I know she will be the villain of the story, and that I should kill her. But on this I will not listen to the dragon. I'll help you stop her, but I won't kill her, I can't. I won't give up on her. I'll find a way to change her dark destiny, even if it will take me a lifetime"

Merlin nodded, "I understand." He knew how delicate Morgana's topic was. He knew she had to be stopped, yet he couldn't end her life, perhaps in memory of his old friend. He could only imagine how difficult it was for Morgause.

Morgause looked into his eyes, "You understand, but you don't fully believe me."

"Can you blame me?"

"No"

Merlin sighed, and closed his eyes. He breathed deeply, and pushed his magic into the earth, where magic was purer and full of life. He mixed his magic with that of the earth and pushed it towards Morgause, so he could read her magic, the essence of her soul, and saw that she was sincere.

He opened his eyes that shone with gold for a few moments before returning to the natural blue. He noticed that Morgause was watching him with fascination, having understood what he had just done.

"I am surprised. Only the most experienced warlocks and priestesses are able to bond so deeply with the magic of the Earth, and only after years and years of study. And none of them is alive now."

Merlin shrugged. "I have been able to do it since I was a child. I've always loved being in the forest, I never felt lonely there." He sighed and then turned, "Well. Let's go. I'll take you to Arthur. Although I don't know how he may react"

000

As expected, the meeting did not go very well.

As soon as Merlin, followed by Morgause, entered the castle of the Kings of the Past, screams and swords were released. Immediately Morgause was surrounded by knights and Merlin was forced to put himself between her and Arthur's sword.

"What the hell are you doing, Merlin?!" Arthur screamed.

Merlin raised both arms to placate the prince. "Arthur, wait. Wait. She's not here to hurt us"

"How can you say such a thing?! She is our enemy, and you brought her to us! "Arthur then looked accusingly at Morgause. "What did you do to Merlin? A spell? "

Before Merlin could say anything and defend himself, Morgause put a hand on his shoulder to stop him. Strangely, Merlin felt no discomfort in that contact.

Morgause took a step forward and looked Arthur straight in the eye. "Arthur Pendragon, what the boy says is true. I came here for an alliance. I can help you destroy my immortal army and reconquer Camelot, in exchange you will let me go"

Arthur continued shaking his head, credulous. "What game are you playing at? Do you really believe that we will trust you after all you've done? Do you and Morgana believe that we are really so stupid to believe that your plan is not to take us to Camelot with this deception and kill us as soon as we pass the walls?"

Morgause silently asked the goddess if this kid was really the once and future king, because at the moment he didn't seem to be. At the goddess's affirmative answer, Morgause took deep breaths and control her frustration.

"I understand your reluctance to believe me. If it could make you feel better, I can swear on the Old Religion that my intentions are genuine"

Arthur snorted, "As if an oath based on magic was sincere"

"Arthur!" Merlin repressed him. "Swearing on the Old Religion is not a joke. If the sorcerer breaks the oath, they die."

"It's true, my lord" Lancelot intervened, "in my travels I met many magicians, and some of them died after breaking a magical oath. It is not something to be taken lightly"

Arthur looked at his men, his knights. Gwaine was nodding with what Lancelot had said, since he too was a traveler and therefore had seen many things. For a moment, Arthur was envious of the cultural wealth that some of them had, unlike him, who had never left Albion and had not lived in countries with cultures different from his own.

Still reluctant, Arthur looked at the person he trusted most in the world, even though he would never admit it out loud. Merlin was telling him to trust the witch, that all would be all right. Well, Arthur wasn't entirely convinced he could trust Morgause, maybe he never would, but he trusted Merlin blindly. If the brunet, for some strange reason, believed in Morgause then Arthur would too.

Slowly, he nodded to Merlin, who smiled. A smile that Arthur mirrored. Then the prince refocused on Morgause, who had not understood the strange interaction between servant and master. If she didn't know any better, she would have thought the two had used telepathy.

"Morgause, I will probably regret it, but I've decided to be a fool and accept your alliance"

Morgause nodded and stepped forward with her arm outstretched, ready to perform the spell. Arthur stopped her.

"No. There will be no magical oath between us, but one of honor" Arthur extended his arm, as he would a knight. "I don't want an oath between a magic-user and a no magic user. But one between two people"

One side of Morgause's mouth rose slightly in what was a smile and for the first time she saw the King destined for greatness and legend. Without hesitation, she squeezed Arthur's hand and the moment their skin touched, she could feel a new destiny being created. A new destiny both for her and for Arthur, and from the gasp sound coming from her right, also Emrys had perceived the change.

When their hands parted, Arthur asked, "Now tell me. Why did you change your mind? Why did you choose to betray Morgana?"

"For years I was blinded by hatred and a desire for revenge. I was so focused on my path that I didn't notice what was really going on around me. I ignored my goddess and magic, and the teachings my sisters taught me before they died." She took a deep breath. "Recently, my blindness was pointed out to me and I understood the gravity of the consequences that my choices have caused. So I have decided to do something. To do what is right. And if I have to stop Morgana to do it, so be it. I'll tell you now, Arthur, I'll help you defeat Morgana, but I won't let you kill her. She is still my family, my sister…"

"She is my sister too..." Arthur said, with a sweet look, admitting for the first time the result of his father's betrayal and lies.

The two blondes smiled at each other and went to sit at the round table to plan.

000

The plan was simple. Arthur and the knights would save Uther and distract Morgana, while Merlin and Morgause would take care of the cup.

Everything went as planned, since Morgause was in control of the army. But it was obvious that when the army exploded once the cup was emptied, that that would make Morgana suspicious, who immediately ran into the Great Hall, where Merlin, Morgause and Arthur were, while Gaius and the knights were protecting Uther in the doctor's laboratory.

Morgana looked around confused. "What's going on here? Sister?"

Morgause took a step forward. "Morgana..."

At that moment morgana saw the empty cup on the floor at her sister's feet and her shock increased. "What-What did you do?"

"Sister, I stopped this madness. Doing what we did was wrong." In front of his sister's increasingly confused face, Morgause explained better. "Since you took power, I've noticed a change in magic, and…"

"Obviously you're talking about a positive change..." Morgana interrupted her.

Morgause shook her head. "No, sister. Magic is suffering during your reign, just like during Uther's. That day on the balcony, we killed wizards and using black magic like we did is poisoning the real magic. Our Goddess is not happy and sent me a message. If we don't stop, she will punish us by taking away the Gift."

Morgana snorted, "Sister, what are you talking about? We are the saviors of magic. We are creating a better world with me on the throne. Sorcerers will dominate the non-wizards, and nobody will hurt us again!"

"This is where we got it wrong. We have eliminated Uther, but it's us hurting the sorcerers now. Furthermore, the Goddess has revealed to me that you are not the chosen one. She has already chosen the saviors of magic: Emrys and The Once and Future King"

"And who would they be?" Morgana asked with the look of one who was ready to kill the two men as soon as she discovered their identity.

Morgause shook her head both to deny Morgana and to reassure Merlin that had clearly stiffened behind her. "The goddess will reveal their true identity to you when she feels that you are on their side"

Morgana seemed unimpressed and raised her head in a sign of superiority. "This information, however, does not solve the current situation. What are you doing with these two?" She pointed at Merlin and Arthur with her head and a look full of hate. "Our archenemies"

"We are not your enemies, Morgana. We are your friends" Arthur said, but before he could continue Morgana threw him towards a wall with magic. Morgause used hers to cushion the blow and make sure the prince had not hurt himself.

"Morgana, Arthur is the rightful heir to the throne. It is his destiny to reign over Camelot after Uther. He will be a good king"

Morgana laughed. "Arthur? Arthur is no different from that tyrant of his father. You told me so many times!"

"And I was wrong"

Morgana looked at her sister as if she didn't recognize the person in front of her. "What did they do to you?" Then she turned to Merlin and Arthur, who had stood up meanwhile, and screamed. "What have you done to my sister?!"

Merlin spoke. "We didn't do anything, Morgana. She only realized that this is not the right way to get justice. She's chosen another way"

Morgana was furious. "I have already told you, you dull servant and traitor. There is only one way, and it is the one with me as queen and Arthur and Uther dead. I don't want justice. I want revenge!"

She raised an arm ready to attack the two boys when Morgause came between them and created a magical shield around them.

"Morgause, stop this madness! I don't know what's wrong with you, but whatever it is, stop it. You are my sister, and you must be on my side"

Now Morgause's eyes became sad. "If you're asking me to choose between you and Magic, Morgana, unfortunately I've already done it. It is my duty as a High Priestess to defend and preserve magic. And I am devastated to have to admit that your path and that of magic are no longer the same. Your path is that of revenge and hatred…"

Suddenly Morgana took Morgause by the shoulders in desperation, "Sister, you can't betray me. Everyone I love has betrayed me..." She looked for a second at Merlin, who immediately lowered his gaze in shame. "... I only have you."

Morgause shook her head slowly, "Sister..."

Morgana tightened her grip even more. "I can't be alone again... you can't abandon me. You are all I have!"

"You're not alone, Morgana" Arthur intervened. "For me you've always been a sister, and I accept you as you are. You can be my advisor, and..."

Morgana laughed hysterically, "your advisor? Why should I lower myself under the power of a Pendragon again when it is my birthright to be queen and superior to all? Besides, I know very well what you think of my kind. You and your father are just full of lies, and I will not rest until I have destroyed you"

Noting that the knights had entered the Hall and were surrounding her and that her army had been destroyed, Morgana knew she had to go. She turned to Morgause and, softening her eyes, stretched out her arm.

"Come on, sister. Let's get out of here for now. We will recover our strength and attack again. For magic"

That was what Morgana said, but Morgause knew it wasn't for magic but for herself.

"Forgive me, sister. But I cannot"

Completely heartbroken by yet another betrayal, Morgana cried and when despair reached its climax, she let out an inhuman scream, and as the Great Hall collapsed under the force of her magic, she disappeared into a vortex.

Morgause was left heartbroken too.

000

The following days passed very quickly, trying to figure out what to do.

Uther's condition was very serious after Morgana's betrayal and he was confined to bed, with no hope for recovery. Arthur was under a lot of stress, but Merlin and Gwen and the knights helped him carry the weight of his new role. The city, the fields and many citizens were seriously injured by the immortal army and Morgause used her magic to heal and rebuild what she had helped to destroy. The people were skeptical, frightened and full of hatred for her, given her involvement in their suffering. But since there was no way for them to rebel and since they trusted Arthur, who obviously trusted Morgause, they accepted her, and a small part of them learned to appreciate her help.

However the time to talk arrived and Morgause found herself summit in the Great Hall where Arthur and Merlin were.

"I was wondering when you would call me, Prince. I was beginning to think you had forgotten me." Morgause said with a slight smile, finding herself surprisingly comfortable in the castle.

Arthur snorted good-naturedly, "As if I could!" Then he became more serious and took a step forward. "I thank you from the bottom of my heart for the help you have given to my people. Not only for having stopped the immortal army, but the help you are giving in healing the wounded and rebuilding the city and the villages"

Morgause nodded in thanks. "As I said. I understood the error of my actions. Nothing can erase the atrocities I have accomplished. But I can swear that from now on, I will commit to building instead of destroying"

"I'm glad. But the reason why I summoned you is not just to thank you, but also..."

"... to tell me that the people of Camelot don't feel safe with me here in the castle"

"I am afraid so" Arthur confirmed with regret.

"I see. Don't worry, Arthur, I won't stay here long. In a couple of days, I will leave to rebuild what is left of the magical world"

Arthur nodded. "I will not stop you. I will only if your mission will endanger non-magic users"

"I gave you my word"

"And I assure you that if you break it, I will hunt you down like an animal"

"I expect nothing less from you. And I assure you that if you were to hurt a sorcerer for no reason, _I_ will hunt you down like an animal"

"I expect nothing less from you"

The two blondes smiled at each other, in that strange complicity they had developed in the last few days, both fiercely protective of their own people and their ideals. If Merlin didn't know otherwise, he would have thought they were siblings.

A couple of days later, when the city had been rebuilt again by the Priestess, Morgause was ready to leave, but before riding towards the horizon she approached Merlin alone, who was looking at the kingdom from one of the towers.

"Something has changed in our destiny," Merlin said.

"Yes, I can also feel that somehow our story has changed. Whether for better or worse, we will have to see. But the Goddess is happy"

Merlin nodded happily. Then he turned sad toward Morgause. "I'm sorry for Morgana"

Morgause didn't speak for a moment, her sister was still a sore topic for her. "I can hear her crying, you know? At night, I hear her scream my name in despair. She is so alone now and scared, and angry. All my instincts are telling me to go to her, but every time I concentrate on teleporting myself to her, I see this halo of darkness that surrounds her. Her heart is cold, cold as stone. And all that is in her mind is revenge, not justice."

"It's my fault. If I had not poisoned her…"

"It's not your fault, Emrys. Morgana had chosen to betray Camelot before the poisoning. I feel inside me that even without the poisoning, she would have become like this, and I take responsibility for it. But the hardness of her heart and the inability to change as I did come from her father, Uther, unfortunately. Arthur is Ygraine de Bois's son, Morgana is Uther Pendragon's daughter, and she chose to walk her father's path"

Merlin nodded and for the last time he sent a silent _I am sorry_ to his old friend, and prepared to face his enemy.

"When will you tell Arthur about your magic?"

Merlin shook his head, "I don't think he'll ever be ready. After the betrayal of Morgana, I doubt he would ever forgive me this betrayal. He suffered too much because of magic"

"True. But I contributed to the almost destruction of his kingdom and the death of many of his subjects, yet I am still breathing here in Camelot."

"I am his best friend... even if he will never admit it"

"If he is your friend, and the companion of your destiny, he will understand. But you're right about one thing: he isn't comfortable with magic. And this is where I will help you"

"What do you mean?"

Morgause looked him straight in the eye. "How can you expect Arthur to accept and understand magic when you can't understand or accept your own?"

Merlin looked at her confused, but with a veil of vulnerability that only a hidden truth could create.

"I watched you, Merlin. You are afraid of your magic, and you cannot fully accept the magic part of you. You can't accept Emrys. That's why you're so reluctant to get yourself called with that name and why you're afraid Arthur will throw you away"

Merlin didn't even try to deny the accuses. "And if it was true, what do you suggest I do?"

Morgause smiled. "I'll help you accept who you are and who you always will be. Something tells me that once you do, Arthur will be ready too. I propose to meet regularly for magical lessons. I may not have your magic potential and your destiny, but I have the knowledge of the Old Religion on my side"

After a few seconds, Merlin gave her a dazzling smile and squeezed her hand. "I accept"

"Good. I will make a great wizard out of you"

000

Once left Camelot, Morgause rode relentlessly towards the Isle of the Blessed, and this time the ferryman took her to the Island and she spent the following months bringing the island back to its former glory, when it was a refuge, a place of culture and conservation of the Old Religion.

She did not do this alone however. Kilgharrah joined her almost immediately on the island and helped her rebuild their old world. And over time, more and more magic users arrived on the island. First the Druids, then the Cathas and then the sorcerers and witches scattered around the kingdom. Each of them contributed to the revival of old religion and, following Morgause's example, they forgave Camelot and committed themselves to showing the good that magic could do. Who was inclined to the art of healing went from village to village to help, encouraged by the tolerance that Arthur was showing towards the magic people, thanks to the pact with Morgause.

The night of Samhain, almost a year after the defeat of Morgana, Morgause, while she was celebrating the festivity in the Great Hall of the now splendid palace, perceived that in another life that would have been the day of her death.

Instead she was alive and a pillar of the reborn magical community that saw her as a guide, as the High Priestesses used to be.

That day she also felt the presence of Morgana on the shores of the Seas of Meredor, eager to reach the island and be with her kind. But since her sister still refused to follow the will of the Goddess, access was denied and she became an outcast even among her people. And given that without Morgause to teach her magic, there was no way for her to reinforce her magic, Morgana had to use prostitution in order to secure an alliance with warlords and kings to destroy Camelot.

Sometime later, Morgause perceived Uther's death due to an assassin sent by Morgana, and with it the news that Arthur had banished Merlin after he had revealed himself as a sorcerer in an attempt to save Uther.

Morgause immediately joined him where he was exiled: the Perilous Lands. She found him sitting on the throne that belonged to the Fisher King.

"He needs time to think." It was the first thing Merlin told her.

"It is compressible. Why did you try to save Uther?"

"Arthur is my friend. I would never wish anyone the pain of losing a parent, especially if by murder. All I do is for him, and now he hates me"

"One half cannot really hate what makes it whole"

Merlin snorted, "You're spending too much time with Kilgharrah, Morgause"

She giggled, "True." Thinking affectionately of her winged friend. "Well, you can't spend your days getting depressed. While we wait for Arthur to remove the stick from his ass, let's recover the magic lessons that we have lost because of our commitments"

And so it was that the two magicians spent the following months immersed in magic and soon Merlin became a Priest of the Old Religion.

On the day that he fully embraced his being Emrys, he used his magic to heal the Perilous Lands, which returned to being a rich and luxuriant land.

That same day a delegation from Camelot arrived, led by none other but Arthur Pendragon himself, followed by his most trusted knights.

Needless to say, Merlin was nervous when he welcomed Arthur to the Fisher King's palace, returned to its ancient glory.

"Arthur" Merlin said, with a mix of hope and fear in his voice as he watched his friend come towards him with an unreadable expression.

Arthur stopped less than a step away from him. His eyes were stern, expressionless, as they looked Merlin straight in the eyes. And when Merlin thought that the prince was about to draw his sword and kill him, the blond did something unexpected.

Suddenly, Arthur pulled him to himself and hugged him tightly.

Merlin was speechless and it took him a while to understand what was happening and to return the gesture, feeling the tension of the last few months disappear. Then Arthur pulled away, even though he kept both hands on his shoulders.

"Never again! Don't you dare lying to me ever again!"

"Does that mean you forgive me?"

The mask disappeared and Arthur smiled affectionately. "You are an idiot, but also the best friend one could ever wish for"

Merlin smiled, "and you are a prat, but one with a golden heart and a decent human being from time to time"

Arthur laughed openly, "Will you ever change, Merlin?"

"No, you would get bored"

Arthur turned serious, "I don't want you to change. I want you to always be _you_." His eyes clearly conveyed the message behind these words.

Arthur had just given Merlin freedom.

Merlin's eyes were wet, "Do you?"

Arthur nodded, "You have always believed in me ... now it's my turn to believe in you" Then, noting that the air was too serious, Arthur added, "even if you remain an idiot"

"And you a clotpole"

The two smiled at each other happily, as did the knights.

"Let's go home. I need a Court Sorcerer"

Morgause shook her head in mock exasperation in front of that honey scene by those two. _Men!_

000

Over the years after Arthur's crowning, Camelot flourished.

Magic was back and slowly accepted by the people. Arthur was a just and good king, and with Emrys by his side he gathered Albion under his command and became the greatest king of all.

Morgause often visited the castle to give advice, to give knights a hard time during tournaments and to be a bridge between the most isolated magical communities and the kingdom. Her life on the Isle of the Blessed kept her busy, especially since Emrys and Kilgharrah entrusted her with the raising of Aithusa, the last dragon, but she was happy to be present when the Round Table was inaugurated and when Arthur pulled Excalibur, the magic sword, from the stone.

Over the years she helped Arthur and Emrys counteract Morgana, who became increasingly fierce in her madness, which grew the more the kingdom joy was denied to her.

Besides, Morgana never gave up trying to win back her sister, even with black magic if necessary. The Dark Tower almost completely destroyed Morgause's will, who was captured along with Aithusa, but the Goddess and Emrys saved them both in time thanks to the Cauldron of Arianrhod.

What everyone discovered only a few years later was that while Aithusa was under Morgana's power, Morgana had ordered her to forge a sword. A sword that Morgana gave to Mordred, her only ally.

During the battle of Camlann, Arthur killed Mordred with Excalibur and Mordred mortally wounded Arthur with that sword.

On the way to Avalon, Emrys killed Morgana in front of a dying Arthur and Morgause, who squeezed her sister in her arms as life left her, again begging for her forgiveness. At least in her last moments, Morgana was not alone.

Merlin and Morgause failed to reach Avalon in time to save Arthur, who died in Merlin's arms.

Everything seemed lost when Morgause remembered the prophecy.

"He is the Once and Future King, Merlin"

Merlin wiped his tears, "What do you mean?"

"It means that Arthur will rise again. But his body and his spirit are too damaged by this life. He must rest"

And that was how Morgause brought Arthur's body to the Isle of Avalon, where she created a crystal shell to preserve the king's body until he awoke. She and Aithusa decided to stay in Avalon to watch over the king, while Merlin would watch over the world from the other side of the Mists waiting for the return of the king.

000

Centuries later, Morgause noticed a change in the air, a new darkness was gaining power in the normal world, and ran to Arthur's grave and made the crystal disappear.

After a few seconds, as she had guessed, Arthur opened his eyes.

She smiled and felt the magic of the earth waking up with him. "Welcome back, my King. Emrys is waiting for you"

A new adventure was about to begin.

THE END


End file.
